Today I have officially been sent to the brink of insanity by my son. I now consider myself well and truly a member of the Lunatic Mothers Screaming at Their Kids Club. I only thank goodness that all surrounding neighbours are elderly and half are slightly deaf.
I don’t blog regularly about my kids, my bloke being the subject of most posts, however today’s events require a little venting for mental health purposes. For the record my aussie bloke has been wonderful and completely supportive… via text message, (this is the only conversation I can manage between tantrums and nappies, and all he can manage between jobs).
Today began as usual, crawling out of bed with a headache due to broken sleep. It dawns on me that playgroup is today. I take a moment to think, there is a lot of work about to go into getting myself and two kids to playgroup, should I bother? This is where I made my mistake… Why not, it’ll be a nice morning out.
1 hour later with baby screaming, and shoes on the wrong feet of two year old we are getting packed into the car. I take a moment to think, Its not to late to turn around.
Nah, I decide, we’ll go to playgroup. Besides, we’re ready now.
20 minutes later, 2 year old has timed his morning poo perfectly, and is stinking out the room while refusing to have his nappy changed. I take a moment to think. How the hell do you get willful toddler to change his nappy without a screaming match.
Ha! Stupid question, you can’t.
Moments later we are leaving playgroup, (perhaps removing him from playgroup will teach him a lesson). It takes 10 minutes to get 2 year old into carseat, ( its one of those days when I really wanted to break the law, bung him in the back and start to drive).
I take a moment to think, when I get home, IF we get home, we are never leaving the house again!
We got home.
While both kids are screaming on the floor I make myself a cup of tea and stare out the kitchen window. I consider all forms of legal punishments, (and some illegal). I take a moment to think. I remind myself why I had kids, this took a while. Once I remembered I held that thought and went back into battle.
This is what most aussie blokes do each day. Croc wrangling just comes naturally.
While most aussie blokes are pretty laid back, when it comes to crunch they are great work horses.
I don’t mean tasks they consider part of the female domain (they are quite traditional in this sense) the job has to be really blokey, like cutting up firewood wood with a massive chainsaw, or cleaning something with a powerful engine, or building something really huge. Put simply, when it comes to the real hard yakka, they put in the hours of labour to get the job done.
All they need at the end of the job is a cold beer and maybe a tasty barbeque, which they’ll happily cook of course. Don’t expect them to clean up afterwards though. Thats not blokey enough.
Strangely I’ve been blessed with a form of aussie bloke who’ll roll out the occasional cleaning spree. I sit with the kids and he whirls around the house getting chores done in an hour, that I’ve struggled to complete all week. Don’t be fooled however, this is generally before guests arrive on the weekend, and he won’t touch a single piece of clothing to be washed or folded. During his cleaning sprees piles of crap end up stuffed in cupboards and bedrooms. But hey, I’m not complaining. Well, not in this post anyway.
I’m gonna start sharing more about being the Friggin Missus on my Facebook Page. Don’t be shy, the page has got the record for the least likes ever! Woohoo… thanks Facebook.
I’ve noticed a beard revival amongst aussie males but also across the globe. My guy won’t be caught dead without his pride and joy. Perhaps its driven by the increase in hairy musicians or the bearded men competitions shown on tv, or perhaps the guys from the Duck Dynasty. Well, perhaps not that bunch of loaded hillbillies. Whatever it is, its becoming a huge trend fellas.
Along with this is the rise of hair care products to help the health and vitality of ones tresses. Check out this home made product already helping blokes all over the world. Reckon its the next big thing hey.
Do I like beards? As long as he isn’t saving his breakfast crumbs for lunch.
Scoop Deluxe – Hand Made Australian Beard Balm