Monsters In-Law

Yep, this post is about those frightful monsters in-law. It has been nagging at me for a while whether to write this post because I don’t want to offend anyone of my in-law variety, however after months of deliberation I have decided,  STUFF IT… WHY NOT???

After 4 fallings out, countless snide comments, sarcasm, bitchiness and he-said, she-said’s, I have finally decided that I am bowing out of my partners family, for good. So let the rant begin!! (I understand if rants aren’t your thing and you have no interest in reading on, and no, we are not married but I will call them in-laws anyway.)

Now I consider myself pretty average on the socioeconomic scale and I’m comfortable here, we both work hard running two businesses and have two young kids. We sound normal right? WRONG!

We decided to move across the country to escape the monsters in-law, (that’s 4000 km’s across Australia), and you’ll never guess what… THEY FOLLOWED US, and decided to buy up 1 km round the corner. Yep, that’s a massive 4 million kangaroo hops, or 4 hours on a plane, or 10 days in the car……   to a leisurely stroll around the corner. WTF!!!!!

Why? I wonder to this day, especially since all they did was bitch about Western Australia when they visited. Baffled? So am I.

Now I know Perth is gorgeous, and clean, and warm (or hot, however you look at it), and living standards are great, so I thought, okay I am willing to share this great city with you, just treat it nice and don’t live in my pocket. Well they have been nice to Perth and some have not lived in my pocket. However, 6 months later, the honeymoon period is clearly over. And once again, we all clearly hate each other. I won’t bore you with the details unless you want me to in another post but lets just say, perhaps its time to hop on that jet and move to the UK. I hear they don’t like the cold weather 🙂

In-Laws

In-Laws

 

 

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domestic goddess mess

So I’m a “SAHM” as I’m known on forums and what not, a stay at home mum. Took me a while to figure out the forum lingo.

For example:

DH – darling/dear husband! Ha.. as if…   I only use this abbreviation if I’m desperate! Not even married anyway.

Anyway domestic stuff… well I’m pretty crap at it according to my bloke.

Well for starters I don’t cook. Hate it. Oh well life sucks mate, deal with it.

Oh and apparently I don’t wipe down a particular benchtop properly. The benchtop that gets covered in formula powder when I’m preparing a bottle for a screaming baby that I’m holding in the other arm. Hmmm… I think I should definitely make that benchtop a priority in future.

Anyway on hearing the dig at my lack of benchtop cleanliness I told him where he can wipe it. Wipe your piss of the friggin toilet seat you animal!

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